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What can I do to get my ex back?

Author: Paul McNiff Return to list
Friday, November 28th, 2008   | Comments (0)

Most people find themselves asking “What can I do to get my ex girlfriend back” or “what can I do to get my ex boyfriend back” following a breakup. They begin to start thinking and philosophizing about everything that could have been done differently. They even begin to make plans about apology letters and other things that might be able to help them score their relationship back.

There are lots of things that people try when thinking about “getting my ex back”, but some of these aren’t particularly helpful.  Appearing desperate is the last thing we want to do.

One of the best pieces of advice you can have is to try to forget about the relationship for a while, and put  your energy into something else. This sounds hard, but it’s important if you really want to create an opportunity to get your ex boyfriend, or ex girlfriend back.

Go out, make some new friends, have fun, and forget about the old relationship for a while. Give yourself a couple of months and make changes in your life. You’d be surprised at how taking some time away from your ex will work wonders for your ability to heal and create the possibility of a new relationship with them.  Note that I say a NEW relationship with them.  We don’t want the old relationship back because clearly that didn’t work!

After a few months, you may have a much better idea of how you want to proceed with your ex. Do you still want to get back together with him or her or have you decided that you’re ready to move on? Act accordingly. If you still want to get back together it might be time to figure out how they’re feeling about you.

Now is your chance to be a little more direct when it comes to getting your ex boyfriend or ex girlfriend back. But, you need to play it strategically. Don’t simply beg them to get back with you, because this is not a good time to be emotional.

Instead, what you should be doing is playing things cool with your ex. If you have spent enough time apart from them, they may actually be missing you as badly as you’re missing them. Don’t exactly “play hard to get”, but make sure that you come across as being ok on your own.

And if getting back together with your ex really is meant to be,  now is the time when it will become apparent. Be careful not to analyze things too much, because over analyzing may prevent you from acting the right way when trying to figure out “what can I do to get my ex boyfriend back” or “what can I do to get my ex girlfriend back”. Just take things slow and play them cool and you should be fine.

If you’re really serious about getting your ex girlfriend or ex boyfriend back and keeping them, then you want to check out TW Jackson’s  The Magic Of Making Up…

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